I'm glad I rode it out. When I am willing to look for it, I have quite a bit going for me. The last time I flipped out was at the doctor's office in May when I had to get my blood drawn. I seem to be able to chill out now. I think it is running.
Running has always been a part of my life, either doing it or wishing I was doing it. It seems to steady me. It is like hardcore meditation time if that is what you need, or it can be imagination playtime fun land with music and dancing. Lately it has been music and dancing, I think that is all that vitamin d I have been getting... From the sun dude. At any rate running has always been a calming force. I think I need to just commit to never ever stop.
It also makes me feel pretty and like a badass. I like to give myself really girly rewards running. When I had ran consistently an average of three times a week for four weeks, I got a pedicure and a manicure. My big goal is fancy jeans from Nordstrom when I have a healthy bmi.
My route right now is heavy on hills and the heat has me sweating, but I seem to be abble to hustle through it and have been slowly adding more. I need to like drive to greenlake and do it twice, or go with sara at work or something. Because If I want to get leaner I need to go long. The hills are helping me build muscle fast and burn more fat, which is good because I was starting to look like the state puff marshmallow man. However, I don't want my thigh muscles to get all big which they will if I keep doing hills like crazy.
I can't wait to go tomorrow.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Monday, December 21, 2009
"There is a girl in New York City who calls herself a human trampoline"
"And sometimes when i am falling flying or tumbling in turmoil I say, oh so this is what she means" Paul Simon - Graceland
I feel like a human trampoline. I am lost and ungrounded and it is both terrifying and beautiful.
Most of the time I think that just like anyone else I try too hard to be "perfect" or "normal", and not enough of my time letting myself deal with my emotions.
It is easy to forget how much anyone person has on their plate at any given time. Each of us has family, work, friendships, relationships, maybe children, or second jobs, and in my case continuing my education. All of these areas of our lives require our attention, and this is on top of just our basic needs like sleep (when we are lucky), stuffing some food in our faces and taking a shower.
Maybe it is ok to feel like a human trampoline sometimes. Letting go of some control and allowing yourself to be sad, scared, mad, hurt, lonely, or whatever else you might be feeling is ok. Recognizing why you feel how you feel and validating those feelings by examining the stresses in your life can only help be better equipped to deal with the challenges, disappointments, or tragedies that you will encounter.
So in 2010, I am going to cry when I am upset or sad. I am going to let myself be mad if someone is inconsiderate of my feelings, and I will tell them so and why in a calm and articulate manor. When I want to be alone, I am not forcing myself to go out. When I am going through a lot, I will sit down and write about how I feel. Also I will not feel guilty if I need chocolate and girly movies.
I feel like a human trampoline. I am lost and ungrounded and it is both terrifying and beautiful.
Most of the time I think that just like anyone else I try too hard to be "perfect" or "normal", and not enough of my time letting myself deal with my emotions.
It is easy to forget how much anyone person has on their plate at any given time. Each of us has family, work, friendships, relationships, maybe children, or second jobs, and in my case continuing my education. All of these areas of our lives require our attention, and this is on top of just our basic needs like sleep (when we are lucky), stuffing some food in our faces and taking a shower.
Maybe it is ok to feel like a human trampoline sometimes. Letting go of some control and allowing yourself to be sad, scared, mad, hurt, lonely, or whatever else you might be feeling is ok. Recognizing why you feel how you feel and validating those feelings by examining the stresses in your life can only help be better equipped to deal with the challenges, disappointments, or tragedies that you will encounter.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
DuckTales v. TailSpin, et al.
I love cartoons, and I hate being a grown up.
DuckTales is better. I still love Balo, wildcat, danger woman (aka molly), kit, louie, and even becky.
However, all of the duck related jokes in DuckTales, are way better than the sentiment of TailSpin.
Scrooge. TOTAL badass(He Swims In His Own Money).
also he wears a top hat and has a butler, don't even get me started on his feud with glomgord.
Treasure hunts, gold fever, the beagle boys, gyro, LunchPad MQuack (and family might i add, he is like the only character in any of these cartoons that have a typical family structure.)
The Boys:
Donald Duck's nephews and gung ho Jr. Woodchucks. Also, really good treasure hunters. Good and catching on to the beagle boys schemes and over all awesome. (no parents, donald isn't even scrooge's son, he is his nephews. no parents...)
Webigale and Beakly:
about ten times more bad ass than Molly and Becky...sorry ladies you are just lame.
Beakly and Webigale save the day in the episode with sailing, and the one with the penguins who love things with color.
Molly and Becky are stupid and I hate them. Sometime they are cute, but they are never really awesome.
I would just have to say that DuckTales is better than TailSpin.
<3
AMH
DuckTales is better. I still love Balo, wildcat, danger woman (aka molly), kit, louie, and even becky.
However, all of the duck related jokes in DuckTales, are way better than the sentiment of TailSpin.
Scrooge. TOTAL badass(He Swims In His Own Money).
also he wears a top hat and has a butler, don't even get me started on his feud with glomgord.
Treasure hunts, gold fever, the beagle boys, gyro, LunchPad MQuack (and family might i add, he is like the only character in any of these cartoons that have a typical family structure.)
The Boys:
Donald Duck's nephews and gung ho Jr. Woodchucks. Also, really good treasure hunters. Good and catching on to the beagle boys schemes and over all awesome. (no parents, donald isn't even scrooge's son, he is his nephews. no parents...)
Webigale and Beakly:
about ten times more bad ass than Molly and Becky...sorry ladies you are just lame.
Beakly and Webigale save the day in the episode with sailing, and the one with the penguins who love things with color.
Molly and Becky are stupid and I hate them. Sometime they are cute, but they are never really awesome.
I would just have to say that DuckTales is better than TailSpin.
<3
AMH
Monday, August 10, 2009
Charlie Quakenbush and I had SkittleBrau
skittle brau
Alaskan Summer Ale
random skittles-
The first sip was good not too much skittle contamination. The second sip was sweeter, but not gross, still pretty much the same just sweeter as the skittles sat. The bottom sips taste like skittles. it was gross.
Alaskan Pale Ale
random skittles-
Actually kind of good. Sometimes Pale Ale's have an aftertaste that is kinda gross, the sweetness of the skittles helped to balance that out. Again though, last sip. Gross.
Pale ale with four strawberry and two grape-
after about two minutes head has died down and we take our first sips, I go first.
A little sweet, but just kinda luke warm summer ale at this point.
Charlie didn't say anything, the lemon tree episode is on.
Second sip,kinda gross but in the end of a beer sort of way, like maybe if it was hella cold it would taste good.
After a skittle palate cleaner Charlie says, aww that is aweful!
I can't really taste the skittles, not as sweet as last time
Charlie says more sour but doesn't change the flavor just the sensation of the flavor, that didn't make sense at all, then he giggled about a Simpson's episode.
after five minutes it is fruit punchy and ready for a frat party.
This is the favorite so far.
Alaskan IPA
citrus two orange three lime and three lemon-
We both agree it tastes like an IPA except muted with a sweet finish, with a hint of tang(according to charlie) Charlie said, "tang."
After five minutes Charlie says it's like barf in my mouth, seriously it is triggering a gag reflex, then he sat back and cleared his throat. It was gross.
After that the IPA was refreshing we agreed.
four grape, three orange, one lemon,
Still IPA. Charlie says less punchy. I am over skittle brau at this point, but I had to have seen that coming, we have three beers in the fridge to drink plain :)
Charlie is calling it an evil IPA changed to a passable amber.
Alaskan Summer Ale
random skittles-
The first sip was good not too much skittle contamination. The second sip was sweeter, but not gross, still pretty much the same just sweeter as the skittles sat. The bottom sips taste like skittles. it was gross.
Alaskan Pale Ale
random skittles-
Actually kind of good. Sometimes Pale Ale's have an aftertaste that is kinda gross, the sweetness of the skittles helped to balance that out. Again though, last sip. Gross.
Pale ale with four strawberry and two grape-
after about two minutes head has died down and we take our first sips, I go first.
A little sweet, but just kinda luke warm summer ale at this point.
Charlie didn't say anything, the lemon tree episode is on.
Second sip,kinda gross but in the end of a beer sort of way, like maybe if it was hella cold it would taste good.
After a skittle palate cleaner Charlie says, aww that is aweful!
I can't really taste the skittles, not as sweet as last time
Charlie says more sour but doesn't change the flavor just the sensation of the flavor, that didn't make sense at all, then he giggled about a Simpson's episode.
after five minutes it is fruit punchy and ready for a frat party.
This is the favorite so far.
Alaskan IPA
citrus two orange three lime and three lemon-
We both agree it tastes like an IPA except muted with a sweet finish, with a hint of tang(according to charlie) Charlie said, "tang."
After five minutes Charlie says it's like barf in my mouth, seriously it is triggering a gag reflex, then he sat back and cleared his throat. It was gross.
After that the IPA was refreshing we agreed.
four grape, three orange, one lemon,
Still IPA. Charlie says less punchy. I am over skittle brau at this point, but I had to have seen that coming, we have three beers in the fridge to drink plain :)
Charlie is calling it an evil IPA changed to a passable amber.
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